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Posts Tagged ‘Spousal Abuse’

As a kid, when it was raining while the sun was shining, my dad used to say: “Well, the devil’s whipping his wife.”

I used to consider it and think “how odd–why would the whole world be able to see that.”

That adage left me thinking that the “devil” was a mean old coot. After all, what man would whip his wife? No one could be that evil, except the bad boy himself.

I admit that I think the devil is evil and a mean old coot. But the whole rainy day and sunshine thing…well, that was just one of my dear ole’ dad’s tales. Nonetheless, it did not take long for me to realize that many, many men whip their wives, and vice-versa.

The innocence of childhood fantasy and ways of thinking, grew into the cruel images implanted in my mind, from watching the aftereffects of spousal abuse first hand.

Not so long ago, it was a hush hush kind of deal when abuse went on in a family. You did not speak of it; you quietly watched, bore and processed it any way you could. You feared, cried and felt ashamed–of what–was never really clear.

Today, things have changed. There are ways to report abuse safely where you can receive counsel and help. It is not something you have to live with, hide or harbor feeling of shame.

If you find yourself in a situation, or know someone who is you can call: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline site. The service is available 24/7.

SIGNS OF ABUSE:

  • Shameful or degrading put down’s
  • Actions or looks that are intimidating or cause fear
  • Control over who you see, talk to or visit
  • Keeps your money or allows you not to have money
  • Not allowing independent thinking, or input in decisions regarding your life’s situation
  • Threatening to hurt you or your children
  • Not acknowledging abuse exist or minimizing it
  • Trashing your things
  • Shoving, slapping, choking or hitting you
  • Threatening to commit suicide if you leave or file charges
  • Threatening to kill you

Looking out the window the other day, the sun was shining and it began to rain. A time in history flashed before me and I whispered to myself: “somewhere, a devil is whipping his wife.” Don’t let it be you–call today!

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